Officially bats?

In the best manner of dirty old men who claim to be reading porno mags for the articles, I swear I only ever read Anne Rice courtesy houseguests who leave copies of her books behind, presumably in a desperate attempt to forget they actually bought yet another trashy vampire saga.

But given that I’ve read at least three Rice novels, all written fairly recently, and stopped dead on page 30, I figure she owes me at least a percentage of the refund she so generously offered recently to readers who hate her work. The brouhaha’s covered here and here and here and oh hell, all over the blogverse.

Here are samples of what she said–the comments were up on the Amazon website until recently, but her post’s been taken down as of today:

“Seldom do I really answer those who criticize my work. In fact, the entire development of my career has been fueled by my ability to ignore denigrating and trivializing criticism as I realize my dreams and my goals. However there is something compelling about Amazon’s willingness to publish just about anything, and the sheer outrageous stupidity of many things you’ve said here that actually touches my proletarian and Democratic soul. But your stupid arrogant assumptions about me and what I am doing are slander. And you have used this site as if it were a public urinal to publish falsehood and lies. I’ll never challenge your democratic freedom to do so, and yes, I’m answering you, but for what it’s worth, be assured of the utter contempt I feel for you, especially those of you who post anonymously (and perhaps repeatedly?) and how glad I am that this book is the last one in a series that has invited your hateful and ugly responses.”

The whole thing’s over here and as far as I can make out, the moral of the story is: Think. Then hit Send. Or better yet, just go to Delete straightaway.

Please note the bit where she says: “And if you want your money back for the book, send it to 1239 First Street, New Orleans, La, 70130.”

I’m guessing my cheque’s in the mail, yes?

4 comments

  1. Anne Rice has that effect on one. Interesting to read that she’s piqued by critiques. Hmmm. And here I was I believing that mega-success in the financial sphere led to indifference to criticism in the literary sphere!I have a confession: I not only read one of her books, I got quite a charge out of it — it may not have been her first novel, though I expect it was the first of the “Vampire” series — called “Interview with the Vampire”. It was NOT like the Tom Cruise film of that name (which I hated and didn’t sit through) and there were a couple of scenes in it that left … well, shall we say, a “deep” impression (bite marks, tooth marks, hahaha)? No really — there’s a description, early in that book, of the vampire’s moment of creation … I found it unforgettably sensual. It’s followed by a description of the new-made vampire’s awakening to a world of delicate sensory pleasure which was (as I recall) quite thrilling. Made you realize how much we miss by being mere mortals. Made you want to run out and bite someone.Umm. I think I better stop.

  2. Ahh … I visited the first link and realize now that there’s a reason why the first book was readable — she hadn’t sacked her editor yet! It seems clear that she’s a highly opinionated nutter. Thank goodness I don’t have to confess to having read anything else — I wouldn’t want to live with myself if I had.

  3. It appears that the people who did send her copies asking for a refund got them back with ‘return to sender’ marked on their envelope..She’s gone from famous author to Crazy Lady at Large.

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